


Post Mortem

by deanisbiandsoami



Series: Why? JUst why did I come up with this? [25]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Afghanistan, Alternate Universe - Army, Cute, F/M, Hurt, It's not Major Character Death for nothing, Kid Fic, M/M, More stuff, Not Beta Read, Soldier!Dean, Syria, but not really
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-19
Updated: 2013-12-19
Packaged: 2018-01-05 04:55:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 977
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1089858
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deanisbiandsoami/pseuds/deanisbiandsoami
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean follows his father's footsteps in early age and enlists when he' eighteen. He's a good soldier, even more ambitious and Cas is proud, he really is... if only he wouldn't get deployed that often.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Post Mortem

Dean had always wanted to go to the army. Like his father had, like his grandfather had, like uncle Bobby had. Soldiers were heroes in his eyes. Noone had fored them to fight, risk their lives only to secure //his// life. 

He wanted to be a hero.

So as soon as he was eighteen, he ensigned. He was a good soldier and he was ambitious. He climbed up ranks as if they were nothing. 

Of course it meant that he was often sent into battle. At it didn't matter to him because he had almost noone at home to miss. Only Sam and he understood why the army was so important to Dean.

But then he met Cas and with every mission oversea he hated war more. He hated fighting, he hated guns and he hated being away from home but he didn't leave the army because this is what defines him, it is what Cas fell in love with and what he tought Sammy, it is what makes his mother proud and it is what he'd always wanted to be.

 

Castiel lives with constant worry. Is he gonna call? Was the last phonecall I got the last time I heard his voice? Will he come back? Is he dead? 

Castiel has known these questions for a little more than ten years. Luckily Dean was never dead, he always came back and Cas aways heard his voice again. 

Dean had just - two years ago - been deported to Afghanistan. He should have been back last month but you know how it goes. The men never came back on time. So Cas sat in his living room. He was used the the constant little voice in his head that said //he could die in this very minute and you wouldn't know// He knew how to not think about that. He'd learned it - the hard way. 

Cas is watching TV - resoloutly avoiding news to keep what's left of his sanity. Two years without Dean is too much and so his a month without a call or a letter. Cas has just escaped his circling thoughts - he hasn't written in a month, he hasn't called, he always calls, something must've happened, he's wounded, or worse, he hasn't written… - when the doorbell throws him out of his bliss. He sighs as his thoughts go back to the vicious circle and he walks through the small apartment that is paid by Dean's salary but in which he hardly lives. 

When Cas opens the door, his jaw drops, he's rooted to the spot and he feels a kind of twisted excitement in his gut. Not that again. Cas groans and rubs at his eyes.

"Not that again…" He mumbles. He looks up and sees him still there, smiling but also looking worried - they never looked worried before. Cas's brows knit together. "Are you…" He dares to hope "Are you real?" he asks. The smile is wiped from Dean's face and his arms wrap around him.

"Yes, Cas, Yes I'm here." Dean mumbles into his neck. "Cas I am really here." Cas smiles and leans into Dean's chest-

 

Cas woke up. Not like normally with a scream and sitting up in his bed but simply opening his eyes, the light too bright… the light… he'd actually slept through the whole night. Cas smiled to himself and then looked at the picture on his nightstand it showed Dean on the day he got his bronze star. He's in dress uniform, smiling from ear to ear. In the corner is a smaller picture takking in a photo booth of the airport. It's Dean in his casual uniform and Cas kissing, it was taken the day Dean left two years ago, going to Afghanistan. It was a tradition by now. The day Dean would leave for a mission they would get in one of the photo booths and took photos. Cas would keep them in the picture frame until Dean came back.

 

Cas found no comfort in the dog tags and the flag that came home. He also did not find comfort in the medal of honour Dean was awarded post mortem. Sam found no comfort in the little golden head on the black leather cord that came along with Dean's dog tags according to his last will. 

 

Fifteen years later Castiel still loves Dean like the first day. Like the day he said yes when Dean was kneeling infront of him in the airport jsut before going to Syria, like the day he said 'I do' infront of all of his family and friends, like the day he'd kissed Dean for the last time, even though he didn't know it had been the last time back then.

Now Castiel is married again - it took him long to get out of his depression, to even try to be happy again but some day he thought 'get your ass up, winchester, what would Dean think of you' - he had a lovely wife called Meg and he had a little son - who by some miracle had green eyes.

But Castiel never got over Dean, he never really moved on. There was a framed picture of Dean and the framed medal of honor hanging over the flag in their living room. Castiel was always wearing his dog tags, his wedding ring dangling from the chain as well. 

Quite often Castiel found himself just staring at the picture of Dean. Not the official Army Picture, that had been standing next to his coffin at the funeral but at the little pictures. The four little squares that were taken seventeen years ago. Dean and Cas smiling at the camera, Dean throwing his arm around Cas's shoulders, Looking at each other and then kissing. Cas would keep that tradition up. He would keep those photos until Dean came back… but he couldn't come back.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry. Thanks for reading :33


End file.
